My Family

My Family

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

On Responsibility

Two lunches sitting on the counter at home this morning.
One homework folder on the coffee table in the living room.
Three kids that will remember next time because Mom is teaching them there are consequences to their (lack of) actions.

**As a note: (It is quite odd that it happened to be all 3 of them this morning is so seldom that any one of them in a day leaves anything behind!   It wasn't even a chaotic morning.  And yes, I made the decision a LONG time ago not to fix every issue that came up because a child left something at home.)


marnee said...

Good job mom!

I was just talking to my almost 12 yr old this morning about an incident. One time my mother was working on getting us to do our chores. She told my sister that she needed to make her bed before she left for school, or she would come to school and bring her home to do it.

Sure enough, the forgetful sister was retrieved from the classroom and brought home to make her bed.

How mortifying - if her classmates knew.

I, of course, don't remember this. I was just shocked at hearing about it as an adult. There are limits . . .

aren't there?

I'm much too permissive . . . but then again. That nurturing thing and the natural consequences thing has always been a fine line for me. I'd like to err on the side of making sure I've done the teaching before the I engage in the punishing.

And my teaching could probably use a lot of work.

Of course, punishing and natural consequences may not necessarily be the same thing.

Parenting sure is complicated!

johnsonteammom said...

Oh, I like the way your friend Marnee thinks. I am all for natural consequences, and I'm sure that you did your "teaching" on this subject more than once. We are frustrated at our house because of some "consequences" that have happened. My bedroom is full of bags and boxes of things that I was told were picked up when I asked if the family room/bathroom/playroom was clean. I expect a weed free yard and some walls wiped clean more than a few times in the next few days as they earn back their stuff. Good job Mom.

Sandy said...

As the parent, the consequence is sometimes more painful to carry out for me than I think it is for the child to endure. (especially if it's a long term "sentence") So I've had to adjust the consequence to something I can live with for fear of no follow through on my part, because it's just too hard for me! No follow through on the promise of a consequence is not a good thing in the long run.

Oh, I hate to think of two little J kids having no lunch! See, I'm not good at consequences.

MnM said...

Oh my gosh. Same thing with us! Kaylie's lunch on the counter when I came home Friday, and Dallin left his backpack yesterday. I'm actually glad he got detention today for not having his agenda with him. I should make her pay me for the lunch she wasted.
Frustrating!! Consequences don't seem to work in my house. They just keep disobeying and keep forgetting stuff all the time. I'm not giving up, but I sure don't know what else to do.

Jamie said...

I give the kids one freebie a year. I think everyone used theirs in the first month. Liesie is pretty good at making sure everyone leaves with their things.